Forgotten toothbrush

So at some point in the last 2 weeks, #4 and I sorted out our issues, and for the duration of my holiday, were doing the ‘fling thing’. It was pleasant, exciting, and it certainly distracted from the mountain of work I had to do. I spent an evening at his house in the second week, which was excellent, for many reasons, not least because I learnt that he is a bit of a freak. I walked into his impeccably clean house (what is it with men and keeping their houses clean as bachelors? Something to hide?! Hmmm?) and found my way to his room. I took of my sweater and nonchalantly flung it across a chair, in a ‘no biggy’ way. I turned around for 10 seconds to remove my sandals, and when I turned back, my sweater was on a hanger and in the wardrobe. I kid you not. He also folded away my clothes when I was not looking...cute.

I was very careful in the morning, ensuring that I retrieved all my wares, and folded them as I packed my overnight bag. He was watching after all, and is clearly a neat freak. I got home, and as I unpacked, realised I had forgotten my toothbrush. *cow* *fudge* *ship* (and all other faux-expletives). I decided to ignore it because after all, it was unintentional, and it was only a toothbrush; my favourite one, but still. He could throw it if he even noticed it. I totally forgot (not really) about it, until I received a humorous email from #4 saying ‘you left your toothbrush. I see you have territorial tendencies J’. I laughed, because it was typical of him, using as few words as possible to try and convey as much information as he could, while asking a subtle question i.e. am I territorial? I responded in kind, assuring him that if I was territorial, I would have parked a car with my name, two photographs of myself and all my shoes (which are VERY VERY many...Imelda Marcos is my hero) inside his house. If he wanted to get rid of signs of me, he’d have to get movers.

The incident made me think that girls are going about this all wrong. If you want to put your stamp on a man’s house, forgotten toiletries and cushions are not the way to go. Things that fit into bin bags will end up exactly there. What you need is something that is immovable, for example, engraving a sweet ‘him and me’ message on his bespoke bed post, or using a candle to burn a loving message on his wall. You need something that requires him moving away from the house, possibly after burning it down, and changing all his identifying features in order to be rid of it. That’s a sure fire way to brand a man as something you would like to own. Because after all, only a freak would think that is the way to a lasting relationship. If you feel that he needs little things to remember you by, I would suggest that you have a problem. I think branding of things should be left to cows in volatile cattle rustling environments. But that’s just me...missing my favourite toothbrush. *sad eyes*